Love ourselves

Question to ask yourself today.

Why do we let people and/or circumstances define us?

I know why... Because it is easy.

My challenge to myself this week was to not let people define me or circumstance. Today our qualifier may be doing well... Tomorrow, they might not be. We shouldn't be revolving our feelings and mood around the qualifier and their merry go round behaviour. We must break the cycle ourselves! If we are sincere with ourselves and stick to who we are (and that doesn't mean 'The _______ of an Alcoholic or drug addict') then it is easier to be ourselves and to love ourselves.

If we can't love ourselves, how can we expect others to?

Love,

Anonymous

Sorry I've been gone so long

Greetings. 

I am sorry I have been away for so long. Part of me wants to tell you I was off doing something cool and exciting, but I cannot lie to the people reading this blog. I have been struggling with life. In particular, with my qualifier, my self belief and my faith. A little after my last message, my qualifier fell back again, and it was at that point I decided I was done (Yes, I have said that before, as we all have)

I needed to take time away from this blog to realize what was important. I needed to get perspective back as to why I started writing this blog in the first place. I wanted to reach out to the very people going through what I was going through. I needed to let people know they were not alone. Before I could continue to do this, I needed to remind myself how far I had come, and that I was not defined by the disease.

In this break I have taken, I have stopped calling myself names (Fat, Ugly, Useless) and I have started to see the positives (if there are any..) of dealing with an addict. In hindsight, I am the person I am today after going through what I did.. and you are too!

Again, I am sorry I dropped off the planet of blogging, but if anything I needed to get my head straight, something that with a bit of time, I have finally been able to do. 

Will post more tomorrow. 

All the love

Anonymous

P.S: Happy to be back!! :) x

Revelation- Watch this space!

I've recently had a bit of a revelation these past few weeks. People tell me I'm "growing up" I prefer to say I'm gaining wisdom through my experiences. 


I am going to start something big, new and exciting. 


Watch this space :)


And hold on to hope, never let it go, hope is what will help us all make it through! 

Redefine Yourself

Instead of being that person with a broken past, instead of thinking you are not worth the happiness in life based upon peoples words and actions, redefine yourself. You are worth redefining. Don't let alcohol or drugs be what keeps your from living life. What happened in the past will never change, but you can change your future by changing your mindset. 

"Losing sight of who you are is one of the most terrifying points in your life, whatever its cause. Do not become weak by slowly sinking into depression, but become stronger by redefining yourself as you wish. It is people that do the latter that often do great things." 

Live and Let Live

Usually, I get so consumed with what is going on around me in my life, that I forget to live my own life. Does this ever happen to you? (If you said yes, keep reading.. if not, I'm incredibly jealous..) 

Why is it that we let go of one thing, and at that very moment, there are about five more things for us to put ourselves into.. at least for me, I often forget I have to take care of me. This often leads to being incredibly disappointed and expecting everything to go wrong for me, to a point that I don't even care anymore. As you can tell, this is not a way to live, and perhaps, it's the way you have been doing things. To save ourselves from further disappointment we almost hide our own lives away (I'm speaking purely out of my experience) and forget we even have one to live. I can't say how many times I have missed out on things because my circumstance made me too miserable to even consider having fun... I was too worried about making sure the other person was OK and looking after them first...!! This is so wrong, we need to learn to put ourselves first, to Live and Let Live, and to look forward to positive things. Personally, I don't let myself enjoy positive things the way I should because I expect them to go wrong like so many other things have. 

Just for today, Live and Let Live. Let go of everyone elses problems and worries, and focus on living your life to the fullest, and to enjoy the positives, because if you allow yourself too, you might find you had nothing to worry about in the first place. 

Love, 

Anonymous 

x

Help Somebody

If you've come across this site you probably are struggling with living with someone living with an addiction. When I say in the title 'Help Somebody' I don't mean helping people with an addiction and trying to fix them but what I mean is to help someone struggling with living with this addiction, and that people help you. I encourage you to talk to people you trust about the struggles of living with this disease. Helping other people out will also help put things into perspective for yourself as well as the people you speak to.

I have been so surprised with how much talking to others helps.
Take courage in this and practice it. I'll always be here

Love Anonymous
X

What hurts the most is realizing you can do nothing

I'm in a bit of a situation at the moment. I have always lived by the three C's (Cannot Cure it, Cannot Control it, Did not Cause it) however, I am at the stage where what is upsetting most is not when my qualifier drinks, but rather it's feeling so bad for them because you know that they can only help themselves. In a way, I actually feel a bit useless. 

While I am very keen to continue on with life, and as I've been told "you don't owe anyone anything, you owe yourself everything" I still can't quite let go. I know I have written about detachment and the importance of detaching with love... but I'll be honest, it is something I am so terrible at doing.. because I'll say "Yes, I am detaching, I love you but I need to work on me and you need to work on you" and a few days later I'm calling up, checking up, and helping out.. something I had vowed to stop doing. 

Then, suddenly I realized, I really can't do anything, no matter how much I try to convince myself that I can. And that, truly, is what hurts the most. 

Love, 

Anonymous